Absolutely LOVED your essay… Very visceral and brutally honest. If it matters to you (and maybe your husband), it should be noted that PHYSICS states that matter and/or energy CANNOT be destroyed, only converted from one form to another.
I watched this movie when I was six years old, SIX!!! And I NEVER forgot it. It resonated with me then and it still does. The movie is called “Houseboat” with Cary Grant and Sophia Loren. It’s a romance movie but this clip is what struck me as a small child. Check it out…